Forgiveness.....

My last post got me thinking. I got to thinking about forgiveness. And I truly have forgiven, although I can not forget. I got to thinking about my Cousin, who I spoke of possibly looking up on Facebook. And though I decided at the time not to, for fear of rejection, I changed my mind.

I got to thinking how he never actually treated me poorly. He didn't do anything to me, and perhaps he doesn't know anything of what happened. So maybe, just maybe I'd give him a shot and trust him in giving me a chance. I can't just group everyone together it's not fair. And I vowed that if anyone attempted to have a relationship with me from my Dad's side I would be open, honest, and loving towards them. If they only made the attempt!. I would give what I could to open opportunity for a relationship.

So I contacted him. I gave it a chance. I love them. I always have and always will.

This is the ultimate proof of love from me. I hope he sees it that way too. I'm putting my heart out on the line. This has caused me so much pain, and to enter into this with love and openness is a challenge and a gamble I am willing to take. Family is everything to me.

I feel like this is my last chance of any kind of contact with anyone from that side of the family. I hope it pays off. It would mean the world to me.

Sincerely closing this blog post tonight.